Don’t Go It Alone


You should know that when I go through hard stuff I tend to curl up and find a familiar hole to crawl into. I hide, I take refuge, I go inward. You should also know I try very hard to reach out when I need to, even though it feels strange. It like I’m burdening people I love, it feels needy and helpless and I don’t really like it.

Growing up means coming to terms with the fact that sometimes you really need the things you don’t like. (Is anyone else crinkling their nose up at some awful medicine on a spoon from childhood?) God made us for connection, He made us to need each other, and He made us to need Him.

For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. {Romans 12:4-5}

One body, each unique, each with a different purpose or gift, each a member of a greater whole. We are meant to connect to each other, share our lives, ask for help and give help in return. When one part of your physical body hurts other parts can compensate for the injury. When you feel joy you don’t feel it in an isolated part of your body, joy is all-encompassing. All the parts of your body work together to help carry a load, they also work together when you rejoice. So it should be with our community. 

Recently, when I was having a hard day, I went looking for some encouragement and found just what I needed in Holley Gerth’s book The ‘Do What You Can Plan’. I borrowed Chapter 4’s title for this blog post because it just encouraged me when I needed it most.  The verse she used for this chapter is Ecclesiastes 4:9-10.

Two are better than one,  because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

Holley talks about the journeys we all go through on our way to reaching our goals and she mentions something I far too often forget: Reaching a goal is much more satisfying when you have people alongside of you, encouragers, who know the messy backstory.

If you let others into you journey and cheer them on as well, you’ll not only go further but find much more joy all along the way. {Holley Gerth}

When you think about the people in your community, in your spiritual body, and you think about the people you want to share your journey with, remember you get to choose. You get to choose to share your journey with encouragers, with people who speak with wisdom and not criticism, with people who guide you back to faith.

I’ve been thinking about the journey I’m on so very much recently…I’ve been thinking about its success or failure and what that means if I share it here. I don’t like to be embarrassed or vulnerable and my great big messy life has plenty of room for that.

I’ve also been thinking about what it means to feel isolated in a crowd. Knowing you’re not alone in whatever messy life you call yours is such a passion of mine. My friends can certainty attest,  I don’t care if we agree on all the things, I just need you to know I’m willing to listen. When one of my spiritual body (I refer to these people as MY people) has a need my instinct is to say “What can I do?” Because, let’s be real, when you’re hurting or frustrated or scared and you have the courage to reach out the last thing you need is someone to criticize how you got there.

I’m passionate about people knowing there’s always someone to call. I’m passionate about people not being made to feel embarrassed when they ask for help. I’m passionate about saying “you are not alone”. So when I think about the things I have to share in this space I realize sometimes being the vulnerable voice is scary and uncomfortable, but someone might need me to go first. I’m certainly willing to try.

Let’s talk about our journeys and our goals. Let’s find more joy along the way. Let’s start here:
What are you passionate about?


About Stephanie

I'm a thirty-something wife, a Mama who loves family, dogs & bunnies. A daughter who loves to cook & bake. A sister who loves to sew & knit. A friend who loves to gab & laugh. I'm a christian & a maker of things. I'm a curator of memories, a photographer of life, a writer of stories. I'm a girl who is learning to love the richness of life in all it's fullness. A girl choosing to seek gratitude for my ordinary everyday. A girl learning about choosing to live in joy. Connect with me on Twitter/Instagram/Flickr @BextraordinaryU

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